Friday, October 02, 2009

Sadness

As I watch another sunrise I face it with great heaviness. To simply walk throughout the day in a seemingly cloud. Strangely being affected by a world that has continued to keep going on. Each morning the hardest thing I have to do is force my feet to move. Confused with how I feel...a question that continues to be asked "how you feeling?" For once in my life I really don't know they have just been so out of control. One minute the motion is overwhelming grief then anger then sadness then dissapointment, then question. Its been like a rollacoater but its one ride I wish I could get off.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Pastor Gaddis: I read your blog from time to time and find them to be quite enlighten. I am especially moved by your candor and willingness to be honest concerning your feelings. We live in a time when many people in your position choose to ignore the reality that the people who live the typical day to day experience need to be reminded that WE ARE JUST HUMANS, who experience joy and pain sometimes sunshine and sometimes rain (yeah i borrowed that). Thank you for reminding us that preachers are humans too. You marry us, carry us in your daily responsbilites and prayers and eventually bury, not only us, but many of our family members. Thanks for letting us know that you have tear ducts also; That you bleed when cut and on your best day, it can just be a little to much. (Calgone, take me away) I salute you for your willingness to stay in the race. I know that it has to be sometimes a lonely exsistence for I am sure few can really empathizes with the burden of responsiblity you have to bear. We take so much and give so little back. But I must also remind you that God has chosen you for the task, for you and you alone, can do what he has predestined you to do. So as you go through through this period of sorrow, and agony and pain of your loss, keep striving to look, even with tears in your eyes. For God has not forgotten his promises to you. And know that even though you may sometimes feel like you are in the tunnel all alone, remember, others have traveled the same path and are standing at the opening of the tunnel with the light waving so that you might see your way through. Hang in there, it is the darkest just before dawn. But you know about joy......hold on till the morning. (there will be another sunrise)